How Your Inner Child Impacts Your Love and Sex Addiction

Excerpt from Going Deeper for Women: How Your Inner Child Impacts Your Love and Sex Addiction by Heather Cronemiller, Lacy Bentley, and Dr Eddie Capparucci

Cover of book Going Deeper for Women: How the Inner Child Impacts Your Love and Sex Addiction with outline of two figures back to back, head down, and two children figures reaching for one another.

Here is a brief description of how the Inner Child impacts your
addiction. It is called the Inner Child Activation Process,
which you will learn in-depth in the Bringing It Home chapter.
We wanted to give you a sneak peek, so you understand how
the pieces fit together.
First, you experience a negative event, which could be
significant or not. If the adverse event correlates with one of
your Core Emotional Triggers, your Inner Child will search her
storage unit to find childhood memories that involve similar
unresolved pain points.
Your now-activated Inner Child delivers a subconscious message
that you have experienced this type of emotional pain before,
and she is frightened. She does not want to deal with this
particular pain point again. When the Child subconsciously
drags past painful memories into the present circumstance, it
dramatically increases your anxiety level.
Instead of dealing with the feelings, the Child encourages you
to numb out or run away. The Inner Child is, in essence, saying,
“I know how this feels. We have been here before. I don’t like
it. Here (the compulsive behavior) is something we can do
instead of feeling this scary feeling.” The Inner Child takes
control of the situation and brings the compulsive thoughts to
the forefront of your mind.
With your compulsivity kicking in, your risk of acting out with
sexual behaviors and sexual fantasies rises as you attempt to
escape the troubling emotional distress you are experiencing.
This is subconscious and can occur in seconds, making it more
challenging to manage.
By becoming familiar with your Inner Child, her Core
Emotional Triggers, your increased anxiety level, and the
techniques necessary to comfort the Child, you can actively
manage your love and sex addiction. Doing this will make you
mindful of the situation and the risk lurking, allowing you to
slow everything down and make better decisions.

At Oak Haven Counseling, we are here to help you learn about your Inner Child, why they use love and sex to soothe uncomfortable feelings, their specific triggers, and how to nurture them so you can break free from addiction. Reach out today to start your recovery journey!